Book One - The Potter and the Clay: 7

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WHAT'S UP, LORD?

Mom started in early stages of Alzheimer’s in 2001. She had always said she hoped to not have what her aunt had.  Her aunt was actually diagnosed with that a year earlier. When Mom was told, it hit her hard. She was put on medication for it but that made her sick. So Dad took her off it until they saw their doctor. The next medication gave her nightmares. The doctor put her on the third one.

Things were going okay for awhile. Then we couldn’t leave her alone anymore. Someone had to be with her at all times. I remember when I was in the hospital a few years back. I was I the Emergency Room and all hooked to say the least. Dad left Mom with me and went home for a bit. Mom looked like she was leaving-coming and going through the doorway. I couldn’t very well go after her if she did leave. I didn’t dare to sleep even if I felt like it. I had one eye open and on her - thinking, hurry up Dad, get back here. He did get back here. That was in 2002.

In the spring, it was arranged for her to go to the Heritage House for the day. Their bus came to get her and brought her back. She did that every week until the next spring. Then she fell in the hallway here one morning when she and Dad were walking. She broke her shoulder in two places. So she didn’t go to the Heritage House for awhile.

That first weekend after she fell was a bad one, she was restless all night and needless to say, Dad didn’t sleep at all. He called me at 6:00 the next morning and Sunday to come down. The Saturday morning. I got up, got dressed and went down. He told me to go back up and get my breakfast. I ate and came back down.

Jerry, Bonnie and Bob came around nine. At 10:00, Dad and the boys took Mom over to the Emergency Room. Bonnie and I went over at noon. Come to find out, Mom’s cumidon was too high. That had to be adjusted. The next night wasn’t much better. Dad called Bob to come and sit with Mom so he could get some sleep. Jerry, Bonnie, Barb and Lew came later.

Whenever Dad went out, I went to stay with Mom. It was suggested that Mom should go in the nursing home. Dad took care of her but got exhausted. We were afraid he would get sick.

He finally had to give in. Fortunately he already picked a place and her name was towards the top on the list. He finally got a call one morning. That was good timing as he was awake since 11:00 the night before. He got her down there and told her she was there for therapy. That’s what the nurse suggested.

She had fallen several times. She’s now* in a wheel chair with an alarm on her. Sometimes it really bothers me to see her there and not home. But I know she’s getting good care and there’s a nurse when she needs one.

Dad had a chill three weeks ago and his back bothered him. He went to the doctor then went for a CAT scan. The report came in mail with a prescription for antibiotic. He had infection in the gall stone. This last week he heard he had a tumor on his liver and has a large gall stone.

I’ve been thinking - Where is this going? Is there a message in this for me? Or what?  First Mom then Dad. I’m hoping and praying it’s not cancer.

Yes, I guess I’m questioning when I ask –Why Lord? Maybe it’s more testing. I’ve gone to him more now than ever before. Yes, I said throughout my story that the Lord’s been there for me. I meant what I said. Just sometimes I feel I have I have failed.** I should say I sense I failed. Then I have to ask Him to get me out of trap referring to mind battles and get back on the track for God in order for Him to use me.

• Jeanette will write a lot in the present tense now. Having given the events from her past, she wrote much of what follows as it happened.
• One of the features of these books is the unfolding story of Jeanette’s questions and how they resolved in her thinking.